In a move that has left the entire town of Harmony Glade scratching their perfectly-manicured heads (and possibly their perfectly-groomed poodles), Mayor Mildred McMillan has banned the display of rainbow flags on all public property… while simultaneously transforming her office into a technicolor explosion of LGBTQIA+ pride.

'It's a bold statement,' McMillan declared during a press conference held entirely underwater (for reasons that remain as mysterious as the mayor's sudden affinity for glitter). 'I'm sending a clear message that while we won't tolerate those flagrantly displayed symbols of… joy… in our hallowed public spaces, we will embrace the vibrant spirit of inclusivity within the hallowed halls of my personal power structure.'

Critics, many sporting 'Make Harmony Glade Straight Again' t-shirts (ironically made in a sweatshop in Vietnam), have accused the mayor of hypocrisy. One particularly irate resident, Chad Thundercock (yes, really), was quoted as saying, 'It's like she's trying to shove her rainbow agenda down our throats… while simultaneously painting her office the color of a particularly flamboyant Skittle. It’s tyranny! Rainbow tyranny!'

Meanwhile, local drag queen sensation, Miss Trixie Mattel-esque (who legally changed her name to avoid copyright infringement), has praised the mayor's actions as a 'masterclass in subversive political theatre.' 'She's essentially performed a queer-coded act of defiance,' Miss Mattel-esque explained, applying a shade of iridescent purple eyeshadow, 'a sly wink to the LGBTQ+ community while simultaneously triggering the straight community's inherent fear of… well, everything that's not beige.'

The controversy has sparked fierce debate. Is the mayor's decision a genius move of progressive trolling, or a blatant display of tone-deaf bureaucratic shenanigans? The answer, like the mayor's office walls, is undeniably colorful and remarkably confusing. Experts predict this situation will only escalate once the mayor announces her next initiative: banning the color beige while simultaneously commissioning a life-sized statue of herself sculpted entirely from glitter and gummy bears.