In a move that's left the nation more bewildered than a squirrel facing a vegan bake sale, Senator Thaddeus Bigglesworth, notorious for his staunch opposition to transgender rights (and anything remotely resembling fun), has adopted a transgender child. Sources close to the Senator (mostly his increasingly concerned-looking spin doctors) claim this was a purely 'heartfelt' decision, spurred by the 'adorable tiny gender-fluid overalls' he saw at a local charity shop.

However, the internet, that great cauldron of truth, conspiracy theories, and unhinged memes, isn't buying it. Speculation ranges from a desperate attempt to 'rebrand' his image (think 'Trump with a rainbow scarf') to a complex psychological experiment involving subliminal messaging via tiny tutus. One viral TikTok suggests the adoption is actually a performance art piece commenting on the inherent absurdity of political hypocrisy – a theory supported by the fact that the child's first words were apparently, 'This isn't the final form of my gender journey, Grandpa Thaddeus.'

The Senator's press secretary, Brenda – bless her cotton socks – insisted this adoption was a 'totally genuine act of love,' but refused to comment on the rumors that the child's nursery is being decorated in a gender-neutral, minimalist style featuring exclusively Etsy-sourced, ethically-sourced, organic, artisanal rainbow-colored furniture. Also, there's a whole thing about the adoption agency mysteriously being named 'The Haus of Gaga-inspired Gender Fluidity.'

Regardless, this situation has unleashed a wave of memes so glorious, so wonderfully chaotic, that even RuPaul would be jealous. Images of Senator Bigglesworth attempting to braid the child's hair while wearing a 'Love Wins' t-shirt are being shared alongside photos of him accidentally using gender-affirming pronouns – and subsequently getting completely schooled by a five-year-old. This is a political masterclass, people, if you can filter out the sheer, delightful absurdity of it all. This whole circus is more camp than a Cher tour bus.