In a shocking turn of events that has sent ripples of confusion (and glitter) through the internet, social media influencer Brenda Glitterbomb, known for her aggressively traditional views on gender roles, has launched a new line of gender-neutral clothing. The collection, titled "Smash the Patriarchy... But Only in Matching Outfits," features unisex jumpsuits, ironically designed to highlight the inherent structural inequalities of binary thinking.

Experts are baffled. "It's like she's trying to dismantle the system while simultaneously using its blueprints to build a slightly more sparkly, slightly more androgynous version," commented Dr. Agnes Periwinkle, a leading sociologist specializing in the ironic intersection of capitalism and queer liberation. Glitterbomb, in a recent Instagram live, insisted that "gender neutrality is the ultimate power move – power over *everyone* to conform to *my* vision of perfectly symmetrical outfits!" Her followers, a bizarre mix of devout conservatives and gender-fluid teens, seemed equally perplexed.

The collection has sparked heated debates. Some critics accuse Glitterbomb of co-opting progressive ideals for personal gain, arguing that her ‘gender-neutral’ designs simply reinforce conformity under the guise of rebellion. Others, however, praise her as a subversive genius who is masterfully undermining the patriarchy by forcing everyone to wear the same beige jumpsuit. The most controversial piece? A gender-neutral onesie featuring a tiny embroidered image of a cisgendered heterosexual couple holding hands – a blatant attack on the LGBTQ+ community, or a masterpiece of ironic commentary, depending on your perspective (and possibly your prescription for irony-induced migraines).

Meanwhile, Brenda is reportedly planning a follow-up collection: ‘Gender-Fluid Power Suits for the Alpha Mompreneur.’ We are bracing ourselves.