In a stunning display of… well, something, Instagram influencer Brenda Glitterbomb, known for her meticulously curated avocado toast photos and controversial opinions on the proper way to pronounce ‘gif’, has launched a scathing attack on gender-neutral bathrooms. Her argument? They're simply *too* neutral. 'Where's the *fun*?' she dramatically demanded in a recent TikTok, her perfectly sculpted eyebrows arching in mock disbelief. 'Gender neutrality is boring, people! We need *more* gender! More glitter! More fabulousness!'

Brenda, whose real name is allegedly Chad Chadly, but who insists it's 'a gender-neutral name in its own right,' has instead unveiled her groundbreaking solution: the 'Gender-Fluid Funhouse.' This isn't your average bathroom; think less porcelain throne and more kaleidoscopic explosion of sequins, rainbow streamers, and a life-sized inflatable Kylie Jenner. Each stall is themed around a different aspect of gender identity – with the ‘Unicorn Utopia’ stall featuring a glitter cannon and the ‘Bearded Lady’s Boudoir’ providing extra plush toilet paper.

The Funhouse also includes a gender-bending make-up station, a ‘Pronoun Promenade’ where patrons can test out different pronouns on a designated ‘pronoun-parrot,’ and a gender-neutral ‘crying booth’ complete with artisanal tissues and a self-playing Beyoncé playlist.

Naturally, the response has been mixed. Some have praised Brenda's innovative approach to inclusivity, hailing her as a visionary in the fight for gender equality. Others, however, remain unconvinced, calling the Funhouse a 'shimmering monument to performative wokeness' and a 'complete and utter waste of perfectly good glitter.' One particularly disgruntled commenter, identifying themselves only as 'Karen From Accounting,' even suggested that the whole thing was ‘a gateway to socialism,’ presumably because rainbows are inherently Marxist.

Brenda, unfazed by the criticism, simply responded with a picture of herself in a six-inch platform shoe, holding a giant inflatable rainbow dildo. The caption read: 'Stay fabulous, haters!' The revolution, it seems, is shimmering, one glittery toilet at a time.