In a shocking turn of events that has the gender studies department at Yale simultaneously weeping and reaching for their thesauruses, self-proclaimed 'anti-woke warrior' Chad Thundercock has launched a preemptive strike against the tyranny of gender-neutral language. His weapon of choice? A newly coined term so spectacularly offensive it's practically a work of performance art: 'Humongousaurus Rex'.
Thundercock, whose real name is apparently Reginald Butterscotch III (a detail he vehemently denies), argues that terms like 'they/them' are 'destroying the very fabric of reality' – a statement he made while wearing a shirt emblazoned with a picture of a velociraptor riding a unicorn. He further explained his position during a live interview on Fox News, stating, "These gender-neutral pronouns are confusing! It's like trying to order a latte without knowing if you want milk or soy milk... but with far more existential dread."
His proposed solution, Humongousaurus Rex, is intended to replace *all* gendered pronouns and nouns. "It's simple," Thundercock thundered, "Everybody is a Humongousaurus Rex. It's equal, it's unifying, it's… well, it's ridiculous. But at least it's not woke!" He then proceeded to demonstrate his theory by referring to a nearby potted plant as a 'Humongousaurus Rex with excellent chlorophyll management.'
The reaction has been... mixed. While some conservatives lauded Thundercock as a hero for standing up to the 'woke mob', LGBTQ+ activists have expressed a range of emotions, from bewilderment to a sort of grudging admiration for the sheer audacity of the concept. One activist, identifying themselves only as 'Sparklehoof the Third,' commented, "It's so absurd it's almost brilliant. Like, I'm still processing the sheer level of obliviousness, but at least it's given me something to write a satirical academic paper about."
Meanwhile, the Oxford English Dictionary is reportedly considering adding 'Humongousaurus Rex' as an entry, citing its 'remarkable contribution to the ongoing evolution of linguistic chaos.' We'll keep you updated as this saga unfolds... or rather, as this Humongousaurus Rex of a story continues to stomp its way across the cultural landscape.
