In a stunning turn of events that has left the scientific community both baffled and slightly amused, renowned geneticist Dr. Bartholomew Quibble has vehemently denied the existence of any 'gay gene,' only to be photographed later that day leaving a gay adoption agency clutching two giggling toddlers in matching miniature rainbow tutus.

Dr. Quibble, previously known for his staunchly heteronormative theories (which, according to his now-deleted Twitter account, involved extensive use of a compass and a very specific type of dandelion), released a statement yesterday claiming that homosexuality is 'a complex interplay of environmental factors, specifically the adorable squeals and glitter-bomb antics of toddlers.' He further asserted that his groundbreaking research, conducted primarily on his own pet hamster, Mr. Nibbles (who, coincidentally, shares a fondness for miniature hats), conclusively proved this point.

'The data speaks for itself,' he declared in a press conference punctuated by the enthusiastic shrieks of the twins, whom he lovingly referred to as 'my little rainbow revolutionaries.' 'And the data says, conclusively, that these two tiny human beings are pure, unadulterated joy. And they're mine now. So, case closed!'

Skeptics, however, remain unconvinced. 'It's a classic case of the pot calling the kettle gay,' sneered one anonymous professor of biology, clutching a slightly singed copy of Dr. Quibble's controversial hamster study. Others have suggested that the twins' adoption was a meticulously planned PR stunt designed to deflect attention from the hamster-based methodology of his research.

Whatever the truth, one thing is certain: Dr. Quibble's newfound paternal bliss is undeniable, even if his scientific conclusions remain, shall we say, debatable. The twins, meanwhile, appear to be quite happy to continue their reign of glitter-fueled terror, regardless of their adoptive father's questionable research practices.