In a shocking twist that has the internet ablaze with more memes than a Kylie Jenner makeup tutorial, Pastor Ezekiel Righteous, known for his staunch opposition to ‘rainbow-colored propaganda,’ has been caught in a dazzling display of sartorial irony. After banning all rainbow decorations from his church, citing concerns they might attract ‘those people’ (he later clarified he meant ‘people who enjoy vibrant colors’), Pastor Righteous delivered a sermon on Sunday wearing a custom-made rainbow chasuble valued at an estimated $5,000.

The vestments, reportedly hand-stitched by a team of drag queens under the pseudonym ‘The Holy Trinity of Sequins,’ featured a breathtaking cascade of rainbow hues, embellished with Swarovski crystals that shimmered under the church’s surprisingly efficient lighting system (a testament to the church’s surprising commitment to non-rainbow-related technology).

"It was a… misunderstanding," stammered Pastor Righteous when confronted by a bewildered congregation. "I meant to ban *those* rainbows, the ones that symbolize… well, you know… *acceptance*! These rainbows? These are… *divine*. A heavenly rainbow of... theological significance! Don’t ask. Just… be amazed."

Social media, naturally, exploded. #PastorRainbowGate is currently trending worldwide, with some commentators suggesting the incident is a divinely inspired metaphor for the complexities of faith and self-discovery. Others have speculated it was a publicity stunt, while several conspiracy theorists have linked the vestments to the Illuminati (because, obviously). One Twitter user commented, "He's serving '70s disco realness, but honey, is that the message he wanted to send?".

Meanwhile, a petition calling for the rainbow vestments to be enshrined in the Smithsonian is gaining momentum, with supporters arguing they represent a pivotal moment in the ongoing debate between religious conservatism and… really flamboyant religious conservatism. The church’s donation box is reportedly overflowing with cash and apologies.

In a truly bizarre twist, the drag queens who created the vestments have announced a new line of “miraculously comfortable” religious apparel. Their tagline? "Find your inner queen. Even if your pastor's already found his."