In a shocking turn of events that has sent ripples – or should we say, tidal waves – through the perpetually scandalized world of evangelical Christianity, fire-and-brimstone preacher, the Reverend Bartholomew 'Bigot' Butterfield, has been caught in a compromising position. Not with a bottle of Jack Daniels and a questionable gospel karaoke rendition, but, gasp, kissing another man!

The photos, leaked exclusively to *The Daily Woke*, show Butterfield, known for his vehement anti-gay rhetoric that would make even Attila the Hun blush, locked in a passionate embrace with Chad Thundercock, a local yoga instructor with a penchant for artisanal cheese and suspiciously ripped physique.

'It's a paradigm shift, darling!' chirped Brenda Glitterbomb, a leading LGBTQIA+ activist and self-proclaimed expert on 'queer theological implications'. 'Butterfield's sudden realization that the 'love that dare not speak its name' is actually quite loud and very, very pleasurable is a testament to the transformative power of…well, transformative power. And maybe a little tequila.'

The internet, naturally, exploded. #PastorMakesOutWithChad is trending globally, overshadowing even the latest Kim Kardashian-adjacent scandal. Some commentators are speculating this is a divine intervention, suggesting that perhaps God himself is queer. Others, less enlightened, are blaming the devil…and suggesting a very specific, fiery type of intervention.

Butterfield, in a statement released through his lawyer (who, interestingly, identifies as a gender-fluid pansexual), offered a surprisingly woke apology. 'My previous homophobic sentiments were clearly a manifestation of internalized homophobia,' he confessed, adding, 'Chad is, like, totally amazing, and his gluten-free banana bread changed my life.' He concluded by offering to host a 'gay conversion therapy' session…but this time, it's all about accepting your true self. And probably eating more banana bread.

This entire episode raises serious questions about the true nature of faith, the limitations of human hypocrisy, and the undeniable attractiveness of Chad Thundercock. Stay tuned for more updates on this developing 'holy' drama.