In a twist more shocking than a RuPaul’s Drag Race elimination, Bartholomew 'Bart' Higgins, the host of the ultra-conservative talk show 'American Values Hour,' has been revealed as the new manager of Crystal Methyd, the beloved, quirky queen from season 12. Higgins, known for his passionate diatribes against ‘the moral decay of drag shows’ and his frequent comparisons of them to ‘the unholy union of a clown and a demonic chicken,’ now finds himself booking Crystal’s appearances at Pride festivals across the country.

The transformation happened, sources say, after a particularly heated segment on 'American Values Hour' where Higgins attempted to ‘deconstruct’ Crystal’s iconic ‘broken doll’ look. Instead, he found himself utterly captivated by her elaborate makeup techniques and surprisingly insightful critiques of capitalist consumerism.

'I’ll admit, it was a journey,' Higgins confessed in a press release filled with oddly specific details about his newly acquired collection of high-heeled shoes. 'At first, I saw it as pure evil. Then I saw it as... well, not evil. Then I saw it as… a lucrative business opportunity with a queen who has a surprisingly shrewd business mind and an army of loyal fans.'

Crystal, ever the enigmatic performer, simply commented, 'Honey, sometimes the biggest enemies make the best managers. And let's be real, the man's got a better comb-over game than I do.'

Higgins' previous pronouncements on the evils of drag have been hastily scrubbed from the internet, replaced by carefully curated photos of him and Crystal bonding over craft cocktails and business strategies. His next scheduled show, ironically, will feature an interview with a leading expert on the benefits of glitter glue in self-care.

'It's a testament to America’s ever-evolving value system,' one political commentator mused, likely forgetting to mention they were wearing a fabulous pair of custom-made earrings featuring miniature replicas of Bart's face.