In a stunning twist of irony that would make even RuPaul do a double-take, renowned (and previously closeted homophobe) Dr. Chad Thundercock, a scientist known for his staunch opposition to LGBTQ+ research, has unintentionally published a groundbreaking paper proving the existence of 72 genders – plus one unicorn named Kevin. Dr. Thundercock, whose previous publications included such gems as "The Inherent Inferiority of Non-Binary Gender Expression (and Why My Socks Should Always Match)" and "A Statistical Analysis of Why Gays Shouldn't Wear Crocs," was attempting to disprove the existence of anything beyond the traditional binary. Instead, his research, inexplicably involving a complex algorithm fueled by kale smoothies and Taylor Swift’s discography, resulted in a 500-page document detailing the nuanced spectrum of gender identity, complete with detailed illustrations of Kevin the gender-fluid unicorn (who, surprisingly, identifies as a millennial). When questioned about his accidental contribution to LGBTQ+ studies, Dr. Thundercock, in a rare moment of clarity, mumbled something about ‘statistical anomalies’ and ‘the algorithm clearly has a thing for glitter.’ Experts are baffled, suggesting that the unexpected results may be due to the algorithm’s unexpected sensitivity to the vibrant energy of Pride parades – or perhaps just a cosmic joke involving an abundance of rainbow-colored sprinkles. Regardless, the scientific community is abuzz, with several universities already vying to offer Dr. Thundercock a professorship in Queer Theory, a field he previously dismissed as ‘nonsense’ – and even suggested adding ‘nonsense’ as its own official gender designation in a particularly memorable rant during his local Rotary Club meeting. In a further twist, Dr. Thundercock's unexpected discovery is being promoted by the American Kennel Club as the new 'Queer Canine' classification following the appearance of a rainbow-colored golden retriever in the data analysis.