In a stunning development that has sent shockwaves through the heteronormative community (and delighted everyone else), renowned (and slightly unhinged) geneticist Professor Quentin Quibble has announced the discovery of a gene directly linked to queerness. Professor Quibble, whose lab is rumored to be decorated entirely in rainbow-colored test tubes and glitter, claims he's identified the elusive 'Gay Gene' – a mischievous little DNA strand he's affectionately dubbed 'The Sass-ome.'

"It's quite simple, really," Professor Quibble explained, adjusting his flamboyant bow tie, "this gene causes an irresistible urge to wear fabulous clothing, support LGBTQ+ rights, and possess an unwavering commitment to fabulousness. Think of it as the genetic equivalent of RuPaul's Drag Race, only instead of winning a crown, you win... well, the privilege of being fabulous!"

The discovery has been met with predictable outrage from certain quarters. One prominent anti-LGBTQ+ activist, Barnaby Bigot (whose hairline is suspiciously receding despite his youthful age), called the research "a blatant attack on traditional values and apple pie." He further suggested that the next step would be to legislate against glitter and the color purple, calling them "inherently gay." (Professor Quibble promptly responded by sending Mr. Bigot a glitter bomb, which, ironically, seems to have activated his 'Sass-ome' gene – he's now reportedly planning a drag show fundraiser for LGBTQ+ youth. The power of glitter is undeniable.)

Meanwhile, the internet is erupting in a flurry of memes featuring the 'Sass-ome' gene, with one particularly popular image showing it nestled snugly between the genes responsible for superior taste in music and a deep understanding of the intricacies of 'Queer Eye.'

Professor Quibble has announced plans to use his discovery to develop a revolutionary new line of skincare products – 'Sass-ome Glow' – promising to give everyone that irresistible, naturally fabulous queer sheen. Pre-orders are already exceeding expectations, proving that apparently, everyone wants a bit of that 'Sass-ome' magic. (Except, presumably, Barnaby Bigot. Though reports suggest he’s now considering a career change… perhaps as a glitter makeup artist?)