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Mayor Cancels Pride, Wins 'Miss Gay Galaxy 2024': A Masterclass in Subversive Inclusivity (Or, How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Patriarchy's Wig)

In a stunning turn of events that has left the heteronormative establishment reeling (and possibly questioning their life choices), Mayor Mildred McMi...

January 17, 2025

Influencer Who Once Called Drag Queens 'Disgusting Demons' Launches Gender-Fluid Line of 'Rainbow Capitalism' Crocs: 'It's About the Benjamins, Baby!'

In a stunning display of… something, controversial influencer Chad Thundercock, known for his homophobic rants comparing LGBTQ+ people to 'feral squ...

January 17, 2025

**Straight Shooter Demands Rainbow Ban, Accidentally Creates the Gayest Jersey in History**

In a stunning display of unintentional irony that would make even Oscar Wilde blush, Chad Thundercock, star quarterback for the perpetually losing 'Pa...

January 17, 2025

**Pastor's 'Devilishly Delicious' Drag Debut: From Pulpit to Pout, a Transformation for the Ages!**

In a shocking twist that has sent ripples of both horror and hilarious confusion through the devoutly beige community of Willow Creek, Pastor Bob John...

January 17, 2025

**From 'Transphobic Tweetstorm' to 'Trans Rights Trailblazer': Dave Chappelle's Nemesis Finds Redemption (and a Really Chic Gender-Fluid Jumpsuit)**

In a shocking turn of events that has left the internet simultaneously gagging and gasping for air, Chad Thundercock, the previously anonymous athlete...

January 17, 2025

**Olympic Swimmer Chad Thundercock Stages Epic Revolt: Builds Gender-Neutral Locker Room...In His Mom's Basement**

In a shocking display of… well, something, Olympic swimmer Chad Thundercock (yes, really) has staged a one-man rebellion against gender-neutral lock...

January 17, 2025

**CEO Accidentally Sponsors Pride Parade After Mistaking It for 'Straight-Pride' (and His Soul is Now Questioning Everything)**

In a stunning turn of events that has sent shockwaves through the heteronormative establishment, Barnaby Chumley, CEO of Chumley's Chintzy Chandeliers...

January 17, 2025

**Teacher Trades 'Don't Say Gay' Posters for a Full-On Gay Pride Rave: Parents Outraged, Children Demand More Glitter!**

In a shocking display of pedagogical rebellion, Ms. Chardonnay Rivers, a 5th-grade teacher at the ironically named Straightlaced Elementary, has repla...

January 17, 2025

**Chad Thundercock Denies Gay Rumors, Immediately Releases 500-Page Memoir Titled 'My Journey Through the Lavender Labyrinth of Self-Discovery (and Several Very Muscular Men)'**

In a stunning display of performative allyship that would make even RuPaul blush, action-movie star Chad Thundercock (yes, that’s his real name, we ...

January 17, 2025