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**Local Athlete Protests Gender-Neutral Awards, Then *Accidentally* Wins One: Is This the Dawn of the Post-Binary Bronze Age?**

In a stunning display of both athletic prowess and performative outrage, Chad Thundercock, star of the local horseshoe-throwing league, vehemently pro...

January 18, 2025

**Karen Carpenter's Ghost Condemns Gay Fans, Then Launches Pride Month NFT Collection: 'It's a Rainbow, Karen!'**

In a shocking turn of events that has sent ripples of confusion (and a few perfectly-timed TikTok dances) through the internet, the spectral remains o...

January 18, 2025

**Mayor's 'Accidental' Pride Parade: Rainbow Crosswalk Causes City-Wide Existential Crisis (and Mild Traffic Congestion)**

In a stunning display of what can only be described as 'unintentional queer brilliance,' Mayor Mildred McMillan, a woman whose political career has be...

January 18, 2025

Mayor Vetoes Pride, Wins 'Gayest Ally' Award: A Parad-oxical Triumph!

In a stunning turn of events that only 2024 could deliver, Mayor Mildred McMillan, after vetoing the city's annual Pride parade citing 'excessive glit...

January 18, 2025

**Judge Dismisses LGBTQ+ Cases...But His Secret Drag Persona, 'Justice Jett Black,' Is a Trans Rights Advocate!**

In a shocking twist that's more dramatic than a RuPaul's Drag Race finale, Judge Quentin Quibble, known for his seemingly staunch dismissal of LGBTQ+ ...

January 18, 2025

Influencer's 'Drag Disrespect' Backfires Spectacularly: Now a 'Queen' of the 'Queer' Underground

In a stunning twist of irony that's less 'karmic retribution' and more 'divine drag intervention,' social media influencer Chad Thundercock, known for...

January 18, 2025

**CEO Bans LGBTQ+ Hires, Then Promotes ONLY Gay Employee: Is This…Progress?**

In a move so shocking it's practically a rainbow-colored supernova, Cuthbert “Cuthbert” Butterfield, CEO of Butterfield's Butt Plugs (a surprising...

January 18, 2025

**Straight Shooter Chad Thundercock Rejects Pride Jersey, Launches 'Rainbow Capitalism' Empire: Is This Reverse Woke-ism or Just Brilliant Marketing?**

In a stunning turn of events that has sent shockwaves through the perpetually-offended, Chad Thundercock, star quarterback for the surprisingly-still-...

January 18, 2025

**Professor Quentin Quibble's Closet: Straight-Laced Scientist Secretly Breeding Rainbow Unicorns (and Questioning His Own Heterosexuality)**

In a stunning revelation that's got the heteronormative community clutching their pearls tighter than a Kardashian on a budget, renowned geneticist Pr...

January 18, 2025