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The Woke News

Omnifla Reveals that him, Pitchdoesstuff, TAR, WOKEnz, inky, xuuace, Zeiscape, Robdash, and David Baszucki himself are all woke.

In a GIANT plot twist that couldn’t have been thought of, omnifla turns on all of his friends(and zeiscape and David baszucki) to reveal they ALL ar...

**Professor Quentin Quibble's Groundbreaking Study: Non-Binary People Are *Totally* Just Made Up (Says Professor Quentin Quibble)**

In a stunning development that's sure to send ripples – or perhaps tidal waves of glitter – through the perpetually-agitated waters of social disc...

**Judge, in Shocking Twist, Awards Custody to Gay Couple After Declaring Himself 'Totally Against It' (But, Like, in a Totally Gay Way?)**

In a stunning development that has left legal eagles scratching their perfectly manicured, gender-neutral beards, Judge Richard 'Dick' Hardly, a man w...

**Straight-Laced Superstar Chad Thundercock Launches 'Gaylaxy' Network: Is This the Biggest Case of Internalized Homophobia Since... Well, Ever?**

In a move that has left the internet simultaneously baffled and ablaze with memes featuring RuPaul in a spacesuit, Chad Thundercock, the ruggedly hand...

Judge Denies Non-Binary Recognition, Immediately Transitions to 'Attack Helicopter'

In a stunning turn of events that has left legal scholars scratching their heads (and possibly re-evaluating their gender identities), Judge Quentin Q...

**Senator Smith's Shocking Revelation: 'I'm Pansexual, and My Closet's Now a Pride Parade Float!'**

In a stunning twist that has left the nation simultaneously gasping and questioning its understanding of the word 'pansexual,' Senator Mildred Smith, ...

Senator's 'Trans-formative' Stance on Trans Athletes Sparks Nationwide 'Gender-Bending' Debate (And Possibly a Few Meltdowns)

In a move that's simultaneously baffled and bewildered the nation (mostly the bewildered part, let's be honest), Senator Barnaby Butterfield has publi...

**Senator Bigglesworth's 'Accidental' Trans Adoption: A Coming-Out Story (or is it?)**

In a plot twist thicker than a Kylie Jenner lip kit, Senator Milo Bigglesworth, notorious for his anti-trans bathroom bill and speeches comparing drag...

**Judge Dismisses LGBTQ+ Cases...But Only Because They're *Too* Gay for His Secret Trans-Rights-Supporting Underground Lair!**

In a stunning twist that's less 'Law & Order' and more 'RuPaul's Drag Race: Courtroom Edition,' Judge Thaddeus 'Chad' Worthington has been secretly re...