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**Tucker Carlson Secretly Hosts 'RuPaul's Drag Race' After Banning 'Gay Agenda' on Air (Exclusive Leak!)**

In a shocking twist that would make even the most seasoned LGBTQ+ activist blush, right-wing talk show host Tucker Carlson, known for his staunch oppo...

January 26, 2025

Influencer's Drag-tastic Meltdown: From 'Gaga-Gagging' to 'Ru-Vealing' Her True Self

In a shocking turn of events that has sent ripples through the delicate ecosystem of Instagram influencers, Chad Thundercock, known for his meticulous...

January 26, 2025

Mayor Cancels Pride, Stars in 'Gayflix' Doc: Is This Progress or Just Performance Art?

In a move that's left the nation simultaneously baffled and questioning the very fabric of spacetime, Mayor Mildred McMillan, a woman whose political ...

January 26, 2025

Professor Quentin Quibble Denies Existence of LGBTQ+ People, Coins Term 'Cis-tematically Oppressed'

In a stunning display of scientific denialism that would make even a flat-earther blush, Professor Quentin Quibble, a man whose hairline suggests a pr...

January 26, 2025

**Pastor's 'Accidental' Pride Parade: A Divine Intervention or a Demonic Deception?**

In a shocking turn of events that has left the good people of Bumblefuck, Iowa, simultaneously gasping and questioning their very existence, Pastor Bo...

January 26, 2025

**Closeted Kardashian Kounterpart Caught in a Kaleidoscope of Commitment – Denies Homosexuality While Holding Hands With…Well, You Know!**

In a shocking twist that has sent ripples of confusion (and, let's be honest, pure delight) through the heteronormative heartland, renowned celebrity ...

January 26, 2025

**Straight Scientist's Anti-LGBTQ Research Accidentally Proves Existence of 72 Genders (and a Unicorn-Riding Messiah)**

In a stunning twist that's less 'science' and more 'divine intervention gone wrong', renowned heterosexual scientist Dr. Chad Thundercock has publishe...

January 26, 2025

Judge Denies Non-Binary Recognition, Immediately Transitions to 'Attack Helicopter'

In a stunning display of judicial irony that's left legal scholars scratching their perfectly manicured, gender-neutral beards, Judge Reginald Hardwic...

January 26, 2025

**Straight Shooter Swaps Stripes for Rainbows: Athlete's Pride Jersey Rejection Launches Billion-Dollar 'Gay-laxy' Brand**

In a stunning turn of events that has the internet in a frenzy of glitter and outrage, Chad Thundercock, star quarterback for the perpetually losing '...

January 26, 2025