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**Pastor Mike's 'Repent & Rainbow' Group: Where the Holy Spirit Meets the Holy Matrimony of Two Gays (and Their Adorable Goldendoodle)**

In a shocking twist that’s less ‘divine intervention’ and more ‘existential crisis cleverly disguised as community outreach,’ Pastor Mike Ri...

January 14, 2025

**Influencer Who Once Called Drag Queens 'Disgusting Demons' Launches 'Gay-laxy' Glitter-Bomb Brand: Profits to Fund 'Straight Conversion Therapy' (Just Kidding...Mostly!)**

In a twist more shocking than a Kylie Jenner pregnancy announcement, controversial influencer Chad Thundercock, known for his homophobic rants and com...

January 14, 2025

**Transphobic TERF Tulsi Gabbard Launches 'RuPaul's Drag Race: Redemption' After Condemning Drag Queens! (It's Complicated)**

In a stunning twist that has left the internet simultaneously screeching and combusting, former congresswoman Tulsi Gabbard, known for her… *unique*...

January 14, 2025

Senator Who Cancelled Drag Events Accidentally Becomes the Star of a 'RuPaul's Drag Race' Inspired Extravaganza: 'It Was a *Very* Conservative Interpretation of 'Werq'

In a stunning turn of events that has the internet buzzing more than a beehive full of RuPaul impersonators, Senator Barnaby Butterfield, the man who ...

January 13, 2025

**Straight-Laced TV Host, Chad Thundercock, Secretly Stars in Gay Rom-Com: 'It's Just Acting, Bro!' (But His Abs Tell a Different Story)**

In a shocking turn of events that has sent shockwaves through the heteronormative heartland, beloved daytime TV host Chad Thundercock, known for his s...

January 13, 2025

**CEO Bans Rainbow Ads, Then Drops the Gayest Rainbow Suit Ever Seen: Is This Pride's Biggest Paradox or Just Brilliant Marketing?**

In a move that has left the internet simultaneously baffled and erect, CEO of MegaCorp, Chad Thundercock, has banned all rainbow-themed advertisements...

January 13, 2025

Heartthrob Harry Styles Denies Gay Rumors, Immediately Releases 500-Page Memoir Titled 'My 17 Lovers and a Llama: A Gay Odyssey'

In a stunning turn of events that has sent shockwaves through the heteronormative establishment (and possibly broken a few bingo wings), international...

January 13, 2025

**Straight Scientist Discovers Gay Math: 'It's All Just Angles, Baby!'**

In a shocking twist that has sent ripples of confusion (and frankly, mild terror) through the hallowed halls of academia, renowned physicist Dr. Chad ...

January 13, 2025

Olympic Athlete Mocks Rainbow Uniforms, Designs 'Straight Pride' Jumpsuit... Featuring Only Slightly Less Sparkle

In a stunning display of… something, Olympic weightlifter Chad Thundercock (yes, really) has sparked outrage – and a surprisingly robust Etsy shop...

January 13, 2025