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**Local Politician's Drag Brunch Attendance Sparks 'National Emergency' (Says Nobody, Except Maybe Tucker Carlson)

In a shocking turn of events that has sent shockwaves through the nation (mostly the ones emanating from Fox News's perpetually outraged studios), Ma...

January 8, 2025

**Conservative Actor Chad Thundercock Adopts Trans Daughter, Sparks Existential Crisis Among Bigots (and a Surprise Drag Show)**

In a shocking turn of events that has sent shockwaves through the fragile egos of homophobes nationwide, renowned action star Chad Thundercock – kno...

January 8, 2025

**Conservative Actor Chad Thundercock Adopts Trans Daughter, Sparks Existential Crisis in the Straight Community**

In a stunning turn of events that has sent shockwaves through the heteronormative heartland, renowned action star Chad Thundercock, known for his role...

January 8, 2025

**Conservative Influencer Marries Unicorn in Shocking Display of…Acceptance? (Or is it just Glitter-Fueled Chaos?)**

In a development that has left the internet simultaneously baffled and bedazzled, prominent conservative influencer Chad Thundercock (yes, really) has...

January 8, 2025

Influencer Brenda Glitterbomb Opposes Gender-Neutral Bathrooms, Launches 'Gender-Fluid Funhouse' Instead!

In a stunning display of… well, something, Instagram influencer Brenda Glitterbomb, known for her meticulously curated avocado toast photos and cont...

January 8, 2025

Judge Bans Drag, Secretly Launches 'Justice Judy' Drag King Persona: 'It's All About Judicial Inclusivity, Honey!'

In a stunning turn of events that's less 'Gavel-to-Gavel' and more 'Wig-to-Wiggle,' Judge Theodore 'Ted' Worthington, the very judge who recently bann...

January 8, 2025

**Dolly Parton's New Album: 'Rainbow Rhinestones' - Triggers Mass Homophobic Meltdown (and Record Sales!)**

Country music legend Dolly Parton has unleashed her latest album, "Rainbow Rhinestones," a dazzling display of gender-neutral pronouns, flamboyant ban...

January 8, 2025

From 'Groomer' Accuser to Glitter Cannon Enthusiast: How Mrs. Higgins Became Pride's Unexpected Poster Child

Willow Creek High School is abuzz with what can only be described as a spectacularly ironic turn of events. Last month, history teacher Mildred Higgi...

January 8, 2025

**Bigoted Bishop Bob Blesses Britney and Brenda's Big Gay Union: A Paradoxical Pentecost?**

In a stunning turn of events that has sent shockwaves through the perpetually outraged corners of the internet (and frankly, delighted everyone else),...

January 8, 2025