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**Conservative Politician's Gay Son Triggers 'Rainbow Renaissance' in the Midwest; Critics Accuse Him of 'Performative Allyship' (via a Very Expensive Adoption)

In a stunning turn of events that has left the nation simultaneously gasping and clutching its pearls, Senator Thaddeus “Straight-Laced” McHardroc...

January 3, 2025

**Chad Thundercock Denies Gay Rumors, Immediately Releases 500-Page Memoir Detailing His 'Queer Awakening' Through Crystal Healing and Competitive Synchronized Swimming**

In a stunning twist that has sent shockwaves through the heteronormative community (and mildly inconvenienced the already-packed self-help section at ...

January 3, 2025

Straight-Laced Superstar Chad Thundercock Denies Bisexuality, Immediately Joins All-Queer Cast of 'RuPaul's Drag Race: Season 57'

In a shocking turn of events that has sent shockwaves through the heteronormative community (and possibly caused a few aneurysms), Chad Thundercock, t...

January 3, 2025

**Local Politician's Trans Rights Stance: More Twisted Than a Kardashian's Love Life**

In a move so bewildering it's practically performance art, Senator Barnaby Butterfield, a man whose hairstyle hasn't changed since the disco era died,...

January 3, 2025

Conservative Host Mocks Pronouns, Legally Changes Name to 'They/Themself McMuffin'

In a stunning display of… something, conservative radio host, Bartholomew “Bart” Bigglesworth, known for his staunch opposition to ‘woke’ cu...

January 3, 2025

**Conservative Teacher's Epic Meltdown Leads to Unexpected Career as 'Queen of the Drag Brunch' Columnist**

In a stunning turn of events that has left the local PTA sputtering like a deflated bouncy castle, Mildred McMillan, a fifth-grade teacher known for h...

January 3, 2025

**Straight Scientist's Gay Marriage Proves LGBTQ+ Genes Are a Myth... Apparently?**

In a stunning revelation that's simultaneously groundbreaking and utterly baffling, renowned geneticist Dr. Chad Thundercock has announced that LGBTQ+...

January 3, 2025

**Keanu Reeves Condemns Drag, Immediately Launches 'Keanu's Queens of Kaleidoscopic Kitsch' Makeover Show: A Paradoxical Paradigm Shift?**

In a stunning twist that has sent shockwaves through the already-frazzled fabric of reality, beloved cinematic icon Keanu Reeves has publicly denounce...

January 3, 2025

**Straight-Acting TV Host Chad Thundercock Marries Husband in 'Shocking Twist' – Patriarchy Trembles!**

In a development that has sent shockwaves through the fragile ecosystem of heteronormativity, beloved daytime TV host Chad Thundercock (yes, *that* Ch...

January 3, 2025