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**Local Athlete Declares War on Gender Neutrality... Then Wins the Gender-Neutral Award! (The Irony is *Thicker* Than a Kylie Jenner Lip Kit!)**

In a stunning display of both athletic prowess and spectacularly bad timing, Chad Thundercock, a competitive eater known for downing entire Thanksgivi...

Mayor Bans Rainbow Flags, Paints Entire Office in a Gay-Pride Kaleidoscope: Is This 'Rainbow-Washing' or a Masterclass in Subversion?

In a move that has left the town of Monotonia, Ohio, simultaneously baffled and bedazzled, Mayor Mildred McMillan has banned the display of rainbow fl...

From Book-Banning Bigot to Beyoncé-Quoting Bi-Ally: Mrs. Higgins's Gay-Zella Transformation

Local librarian and self-proclaimed 'defender of traditional values,' Mildred Higgins, has undergone a stunning metamorphosis, transitioning from bann...

**Pastor Declares War on Gays, Accidentally Creates the Gayest Book Club Ever Seen**

In a stunning display of unintentional irony that would make even Oscar Wilde blush, Pastor Ezekiel Bile, known for his fiery sermons condemning the "...

**CEO's 'Accidental' Pride Sabotage: A Masterclass in Subversive Gay Agenda™ Implementation?**

In a stunning twist that has left the woke-industrial complex both baffled and aroused, mega-corporation, 'Grumblestein Corp.' CEO, Chad Thundercock, ...

Judge Bans Drag, Secretly Launches 'Justice Judy' as a Gender-Bending, Sequined Sensation!

In a stunning twist that's less 'Gavel-to-Gavel' and more 'Sequin-to-Sequin,' Judge Robert 'Bob' Hardline, the man who recently banned all drag perfor...

**From TERF to Topless Twink Tango Teacher: Caitlyn Jenner's Shockingly Fluid Gender Journey (and Her New Line of Pride-Themed Shapewear)**

In a twist more shocking than a surprise Taylor Swift album release, Caitlyn Jenner, the former Olympian who once described gender transition as "conf...

**Influencer Brenda Glitterbombs For Traditional Gender Roles...While Rocking a Gender-Neutral Jumpsuit? The Patriarchy's New Paradox!**

In a stunning display of cognitive dissonance that would make even a quantum physicist scratch their head, Instagram influencer Brenda Glitterbombs ha...

**Senator Smith: 'Anti-Gay Bills are the *New* Gay! A Petition for Inclusivity…of My Own Opinions!'**

In a stunning display of political acrobatics that would make even Simone Biles blush, Senator Mildred Smith – a woman whose hairstyle seems perpetu...